RANT: ‘Fixer Upper’ Is The Biggest Bunch Of Bullshit

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This is going to be controversial article for some but it has to be said. As I get a bit older, I find myself really gravitating towards shows around buying, selling, and renovating homes. There are few hits that never get old like This Old House (those dudes know what the fuck is up) and others that fall short like HGTV’s hit show, Fixer Upper which is the biggest bunch of bullshit I have ever seen. I have given the show more than enough opportunities, but after today’s episode I am calling it quits. If you haven’t seen the show, it’s about a couple who fixes up an old and rundown home and by the time the episode is finished, they reveal a newly renovated house. One of the more obscene problems is that they don’t leave Texas. The budget is usually $100,000 with around $100,000 renovation budget. Where I am from, 100k gets you a half acre of nothing. It is really frustrating seeing a budget with out of touch line items. Usually the episode goes as such:

Host: This house a lot of potential. What’s the budget?

Homeowner: Well, I spent 105k on the home, so i have 80k reno budget.

Host: With that budget, we will have a lot of options.

Homeowner: Great!

works on home for 5 weeks

Homeowner: Wow I love what you did to the house! You opened up the floor plan and put in barn doors for my closet! I love it!

END OF EPISODE

Does everyone in Texas want the same fucking house? It is the same shit every episode. They first find a rundown home, paint the every brick they can see, knock down a few walls opening up the floor plan, paint everything white and put in dark cabinets. Oh and I forgot – gotta put barn doors on the closet in the master bedroom. These two are one trick ponies. Do something else with your designs and for God’s sake: stage the home realistically…Am I the only one who notices they never put a TV anywhere in sight?

Side note: no one wants to see your kids “help” every episode…

I’m going back to the OG’s of duel home renovation – Property Brothers. That or Love it or List It IDGAF.

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2 comments

  1. Sounds like you have a bad case of Show Envy. They do excellent work and I LOVE seeing the kids. You don’t like it….well, it’s like everything else – go somewhere else – which is what you say you are going to do!!! But why be mean and bad mouth people you don’t EVEN know???

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  2. False – and also, bad rebuttal. You cannot and will not pull the “IF YOU DONT LIKE IT MOVE OUTTA THE COUNTRY” bullshit excuse – especially when it comes to HGTV shows. I am an expert at HGTV network. You are barking up the wrong barn door buddy. lmfaoo

    The main point is, with the amount of great content they produce, this is at the bottom of the totem pole, catering to mindless viewers. And why would I bash other people you ask? Because I am a hater/grudge guy. I hate a lot of people I don’t know. I hate Hitler. Do you know him? “WHY WOULD I BAD MOUTH PEOPLE I DONT EVEN KNOW?!”

    Thanks for the comment. It helps the website grow.

    Cheers. – Qguy

    Like

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